Many women pray “Lord send me a good man,” instead of praying “Lord make me a good woman, worthy of that man.” I once had this mindset too, until I grew up and my girl-like ways, became mature and womanly. But to come to this humble realization, requires much prayer and sacrifice. I began thinking of and praying for my future husband at the earliest time I can remember back on, at the age of four and since then he has been on my mind, my heart and a prayer for him always on my lips. Yet growing up, we all must go through many stages in life to reach our ultimate goal. I had to suffer through the loss of a father, the loss of a brother, pain and heartache in the loss of what I thought was love, to be broken down time and time again, only for my spirit to someday be rebuilt and made anew in Christ. I felt myself being allowed to be shaken, beaten and torn apart and when I grew and wiped my tears of the past, I knew the reason…one day I would be a strong, loving, virtuous woman of God, worthy of the extraordinary man I had long been searching for. In perpetual adoration, in front of the Blessed Sacrament, in the presence of Christ Himself, where one can find most answers in life, the words came to me: “Make me worthy in every way, of this life I pray and hope for. Make me a woman worthy of the man I pray for and let my future be fruitful!” God said to me in the stillness of my heart and the silence of my soul: “The bridegroom awaits…prepare to be a worthy bride!” To whom much is given, much is expected and one does not receive such an enormous blessing without a cross and some serious hard work. May God give you also, the humility and strength to commit to this hard work and journey, which may contain some thorns and tears, only to one day come upon the one God has set before you all your life; you were only too blind to see it. Let God say to your heart “you will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart.” When you seek to find your true self, your true identity in Christ, your future husband will one day find you in Christ.
I will never forget the words I heard before my God in adoration: “You will find him in front of me.” And so I will… And so you shall. May the light of Christ forever reign in your heart. Be happy and make ready, for your bridegroom awaits!